It’s another week gone already! 2009 is moving so fast. So fast that some people use it as an excuse to rush out in their clothes with no thought and end up looking sloppy, which is what this week’s informative post is about. If you can take regular time-outs to pull on your own penis repeatedly in order to gain pleasure (don’t lie to yourself), then you should have the time to make sure your outfits look good before stepping outside.
We will give some of you benefit of the doubt and assume many of your schoolboy errors are due to a lack of understanding. That. Must. Change. These are the worse things any man can do with his style. Learn these flaws and NEVER let anyone catch you doing them. Don’t even think about doing them. Don’t even think about possibly, thinking about thinking about potentially doing them…even in theory.
Table of Contents
1) SUNGLASSES IN THE DARK
This irritation has stood the test of time. I am always open to accepting new ideas. I am always open to learning new things. I will give benefit of the doubt to things that I initially judge in the hope that I will learn, and accept these things. This HASN’T worked with wearing sunglasses in the dark.
It is a contradiction. If you’re in a nightclub, downstairs, at night, there is no sun. NO sun. You don’t look cool, you look like a fool. It’s the scream for attention that makes you look insecure. Would you wear a hat and woolly scarf on the beach in the Mediterranean? Do the maths!
Do it Right: Where them when the sun is out to protect your eyes and add style without pretence. Your best bet is something like Aviators or Tom Ford sunglasses. They are timeless.
2) GLOVES WITH T-SHIRTS
Why keep your hands warm and let your forearms freeze? Even if it wasn’t cold outside, why wouldn’t you want your hands to breathe? I could go on. Wearing gloves with a T-shirt makes your hands look bigger and your arms smaller. It looks so amateur and un-stylish.
Do it Right: Where gloves when it is cold or to add some style to your overall outerwear look, with a long sleeve jacket. Read our blog post on gloves to find the perfect pair for you.
3) CHUNKY TRAINERS WITH SKINNY JEANS
Have you told your parents that you have finally achieved your dreams of looking like a human golf club? Tell them! Oh please tell them! They’ll be so happy.
Do it Right: Match chunkier trainers and boots with bootcut or looser, comfort fit jeans or combats. It creates a manly, rugged look.
4) TOO LONG OR TOO SHORT TIE LENGTHS
This is a sure-fire way to look like you’ve not even attended primary school, whilst simultaneously looking plain idiotic. In this judgmental world, a man’s intelligence and outlook on life is judged on how he presents himself. This is a basic that must be learnt. A fat kipper hanging from your neck looks just as bad as a 10 metre jellied eel. Not tasty.
Do it Right: Here’s a tip that will change your life; the tip of your tie should always rest just above your belt. Not way above it. Not way below it. JUST above it, nearly touching.
5) BACK PACKS WITH SUITS
This looks SO terrible. You’ll score maximum points for totally ruining the elegance of the suit which is ‘A Man’s Armour’. Congratulations. Give up your job and go back to primary school. You’ll fit right in.
Do it Right: Don’t do it, it’s that simple. Go for a classic briefcase or upgrade your style and rock your suit with a leather holdall. Here’s another life-changing tip; when wearing a suit, no bag straps should ever touch it.
So, don’t make these mistakes. Just don’t.